O Where O Where Have Our Antelope Gone?

(Sung to the tune of "O Where O Where Has My Little Dog Gone?")

O where o where have our antelope gone
O where o where can they be?
With their bright white markings
And long black horns
O where o where can they be?

Since my parents left on September 5th, we have seen no more antelope in our backyard. It is quite sad actually, for they have been here since we moved in on May 30th. It's funny how you get used to things and since they've been gone, I have realized how much they kept me company and how comforted I have been having them nearby. It was like I wasn't alone out here in this vast land of prairies and mountains. The cattle haven't been back either, but this very morning a herd of them moved through. I kept hearing weird growling sounds and I thought it was a new dog in the neighborhood or something. And then I looked out the window and there they were. They grazed through pretty quickly but it made me smile as I watched them. It seems such a simple silly thing, and I realize there's less to eat as the seasons change and that migratory patterns play a part. And it's not really as if they were our antelope or our cattle, but it sort of felt that way. As if they knew we were here and came to visit us.

Things are changing. The season, Levi, me, Jason, even Jasmine has gotten fatter. :) So I find myself grieving again for those I love and miss so dearly, not because I'm unhappy or regret our new journey. But just because sometimes my heart just aches for what once was. And I have to rely on the Lord to be my comfort. Everything changes. But He always stays the same. And I am so very thankful....

A Prayer from a Two Year Old

Tonight at bedtime: "Dear God, thank you for mommy and her head and her eyes and her mouth and the wall and the door and for blanket and this blanket and bear and for eyes" (as he's rubbing his eyes)..... the simplicity of it all... oh to be like thee....

Inspired

I've been reading the Mark of the Lion series by Francine Rivers which I highly recommend, by the way. I'm on the third and final book and I just have to say that I have truly been inspired. Her characters are so real and imperfect yet their conversations with the Lord throughout their daily experiences have grabbed ahold of my mind and won't let go. The books are written based around the time Rome destroyed Jerusalem and tells of believers who survive. Although, it is fiction, I know the times then were horrible when Christians were sent to the arena for the public to watch them being torn apart and eaten by lions. But the faith of these believers transcends me and I have found myself thinking about them during my day. What would Hadassah or Theopholis do? How would they pray? I have been stuggling with Levi. He and I are so much alike with strong wills of our own and I have found myself desperate in how to raise him, how to get through to him, how to teach him to obey. So I have been praying differently. I don't know how to explain it, I pray through my days often. But, somehow, it's gentler, more peaceful. Maybe it's the place from which I pray from, the solemn need for the Lord to do something in me and through me that will reach a two year old. Maybe it's finally a place where I have totally removed myself from the equation because I've come to realize that I can't do it. Believe me I've tried and read books about trying. The amazing thing is, although I can't put my finger on it, it's working. It's like Jesus is truly coming forth from my mouth and thoughts and hands through the Holy Spirit. I know it's not me. I am impatient and critical and negative and selfish, but in spite of me, Jesus is taking care of my two year old. He has heard my desperate prayers that sometimes don't even have words and inspires me to do and say things that are kind and gentle and compassionate and full of love. Thank you Jesus. All I can say is thank you.....

Close Encounters of the Stinky Kind

Episode #1:

11:00pm at night... I let Jasmine out to go potty before we head to bed but instead of going potty she darts out into the bushes at the edge of our rock yard which of course is open to the prairie behind us... I run out in my night gown yelling at her to stop which of course she doesn't and I can't exactly chase after her because I have no shoes on. Levi can run across the rocks with no shoes, but I, however, can not. So I stand there screaming her name to come back. And then... she turns toward me kind of stunned and coughing and I see something large running away... yes, a skunk! I'm furious and grab her holding her away from me to take her in to give her an immediate bath. Yuck, did she ever STINK! And we sleep with the windows open so now our house stinks, too. Thankfully, I don't think she got a full shot of whatever the skunk was firing because I was able to bathe her and get the smell out right away. Oh my goodness.

Episode #2:

Today I took Levi to the library for the first time for their Toddler story time and to get a library card and check out some books. It was great! We had a good time together. So on the way home I stopped to get gas. It was kind of an unusual "gas getting" time because I had to back in because all the other cars were blocking the entrance to my pump and then a man asked my help in reading the instructions at his pump. So it took me a few minutes to get mine going and I don't know if I was distracted or the pump was at fault but when the nozzle clicked to tell me it was finished filling my tank, I went to take it out and it shot out gasoline all over me! I was stunned and needless to say STINKY! I went to the cashier and asked for some paper towels meanwhile wondering what the heck had just happened. I seriously have never had that happen to me before and I hope never again. I came directly home and got in the bathtub but still can smell gasoline....

oh well, what are ya gonna do?..... hope you get some chuckles... :)

The World of Potty Training

Okay, so today is day 10 of the potty training saga. The very first thing I have to say is that I'm so tired of getting peed on!!! You know how boys are and mostly Levi is doing fantastic. It's just that our toilet seats have a gap between the seat and the base so most of the time he just pees right between them which of course gets me or the floor/wall all wet. Yuck! He's doing okay with the #2 side of things, although the first day he actually went on the kitchen floor (because we were letting him run around naked to make it easier) and Jason wretched and left the room. Thanks a lot, I said! So there me and Levi are cleaning up his poop. Even Levi said it was gross and of course I said, "that's why you go in the potty and not in the floor!" To be honest, it's hard to stay positive and encouraging for him. At this point, the last thing I want to do is be in the bathroom, but there we are every thirty minutes or so. My parents have been visiting this week, so mom is helping me out and I couldn't thank her enough! I'm getting a little bit of a break anyway. Most often, they are laughing at me because I'm saying things like "You are responsible for what comes out of your body, Levi, and you can't pee on me and all over the bathroom! It's yucky!"........ LOL......... Think happy thoughts for me..............